♟ Wacky Wednesday – Public Holiday Pandemonium ♟
This week’s Wacky Wednesday started way earlier than usual thanks to the public holiday—and the Helderberg chess players showed up in droves. By the time Naomi arrived at The Warren, John Gordon was already scowling as he scrambled to produce tiny interim sets for the flood of early birds. More than 20 players piled in, eager to destroy their opponents.
Newcomer Tyler wasted no time proving he’s the real deal, making Alex sweat and holding Naomi to a solid draw – clearly not here to be anyone’s warm-up game. The triplets stormed in like a three-headed tornado, alternating between crushing their opponents in chess games and trying to convince Mom to buy wildly overpriced figurines. (Maryna, ever the hero, brought out a “box of rejects”… which still came with a price tag. Now the question is: who’s painting them?)
Tiny but mighty Evan fearlessly faced opponents five times his age and left them sweating. Oppar and Olindar arrived with their trademark megawatt smiles and gave Clive a proper workout over the board. Owen rolled in with full fanfare and his daughters in tow – thrilling Naomi and horrifying Alyssa, who immediately got roped into a game. Alyssa, unfazed, chalked up a win and a draw… but karma struck in her match against her mom.
It started as an Alyssa masterpiece – up a piece and a rook—but Naomi unleashed peak psychological warfare, and Alyssa eventually had to resign. A small crowd gathered to witness Naomi’s “miracle comeback,” and Dan Frank shook his head in pity, muttering that “the stockfish eval bar would’ve looked like a heart-rate graph.”
Meanwhile, Tian, fresh from discovering the club at Triggerfish market, was on fire. His over-the-board “blindness” finally cured, he racked up win after win, then cornered Dan Frank (Helderberg A-team veteran) for some high-level secrets – while Dan calmly multitasked and defeated Alex in a serious game.
Jordan politely asked Naomi for a game just as she challenged Tyler, so she attempted a two-board simul. Bad idea. Jordan came armed with devious tricks and Naomi barely survived before handing him off to a replacement opponent, who narrowly pulled off a win. Jordan is one to watch!
As the day wound down, Stefan and Theo arrived – only to discover everyone packing up (they did not get the memo). Naomi still tried to sneak in one last game in the name of empathy, but Alyssa had hit her chess quota and even her friends had to be dragged away from their Fallout board game.
Another day of chaos, comedy, and killer moves – exactly how a Wacky Wednesday should be.
